One of the reasons I chose to stay in the Banglamphu area of Bangkok was because it was cheap & within walking distance to the sights I wanted to see—The Grand Palace & the Reclining Buddha. On my first day, I spent hours on one block of Khao San Rd. Yes, I said hours because there was soooooo much to see! You go into one store, view the tons of items packed into the small space as you make your way to the back only to find it leads out into an alley where there were many other stores. And of course I had to go into all of them, [insert loud cackle here]. This was pretty frequent & by the time I came out of an alley, I could find myself on a different street altogether which meant I had to explore it. Then I’d double back to the store I left off with on Khao San, only to go next door to continue that block’s adventure.
Once I finished checking out all the stores & vendors on one side of the block I had to go the other side, which also led to some interesting alleyways. But after awhile, I decided to venture further to see if I could find the Grand Palace. I got to the block’s corner & spied it in the distance & boy, did it indeed look very grand. Only thing is, how do I get over there? There were no crosswalks that I could see leading to the other side of the street, I should say friggin’ THOUROUGHFARE. I mean, there were no less than 4 lanes of traffic in each direction of the darn thing. Massive buses spewing thick grey clouds of smoke took me back to the day when the U.S. streets were choked with the stuff. Dozens of motorcycles bellowing along, plus the numerous cars made what seemed a never ending procession of activity. If I were drawn as a cartoon character in that moment, I would have appeared something like Peanuts’ Woodstock standing on a corner looking at the Grand Canyon with those exasperated marks coming out of my head.
I stood there for a while looking like I’d lost my puppy but determined not to give up. ‘How the HELL do I get over there?’ I asked myself, looking in all directions, then OH NO. OH NO THEY DID-ENT! I see 2 men crossing in the middle of the street! I can not believe it. I just can not. Then I see a couple more go for it. ‘Oh no-hoh’ [when the word no has more than one syllable] gotta say it again, ‘oh no-hoh,’ that was a bit too sky divery for my taste, so I decide to try walking on the street that was parallel to my object of attention.
After about 10 minutes on my alternative route, I encounter one of the things the Lonely Planet cautions you against: the very friendly, well-dressed English-speaking native who comes up to you out of nowhere, & I MEAN OUT OF NO—WHERE, ‘cause I was paying attention like I promised my friends & loved ones. I have been indicted & pled guilty to the charge that I see nothing but that exotic bird or tree while yelling, ‘ooh ooh ooooooh, look at thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat—KER-PLUNK! & either falling, tripping. or banging into something clearly in obvious sight. Ouch!
Anywho, the scam begins as these very friendly & eagerly helpful folk befriend you by holding out their hand for an American style handshake, but I knew full well the Thai greeting is placing the hands together in prayer like when we say ‘Namaste’ in yoga class. So I was prepared for him, by smugly placing my hands together & bowing my head slightly to which he replied ‘oh ho!’ then put hands together too. I thought that was the end of it, but the dude still tried to scam me! After asking where you’re going & even if you give a cryptic answer, they tell you the place you want to go is closed & try to direct you some place else. At the time I read the Lonely Planet, they assured their readers it was basically harmless; just continue on to do your thing. Which I did after we cordially parted, but I made sure I kept turning to see where the hell he was going!
I’m not exactly sure what the point of the scam is but can only surmise they try to direct you to a friend or cousin’s business. I remember when I was going in & out of stores on my one block that I walked past a very aggressive vendor [other than the one that tried to beat me down]. The man would not take no until I walked into his shop to look at his catalog. That’s when I saw his wares were men’s suits so all I could ask myself was ‘what’s the point?’
Back to my quest, after awhile, I didn’t see any crosswalks & though disappointed, decided to head back to my block as it was getting dark & I had already spied out the restaurant for my dinner.
To actually taste one of my favorite cuisines, Thai food in Thailand itself, was Heaven. But good lawd, it was hot as Hades in Bangkok.